Hey, it’s a new year! My resolutions are CLEARLY not blogging more consistently or keeping up with my side projects or communicating with my friends.
I don’t want this lovely place to go to waste. So I propose a new, sillier function. Weekly open thread! What does that mean? Um, so use this post kind of like a message board I guess. Say hi! Start a conversation. For example, I’d like to know what you’re reading. Right now. Novel-wise. I mean, I know you’re reading this post.
I’m reading Out of the Ashes by R.W. Day and I am on the fence on whether or not I like it but I’m reading it on the Kindle I got for Christmas and the AWESOMENESS of that is distracting me from whether or not the book sucks.
So, hi ladies and lurking menfolk. Come play. It’s Girl Talk Thursday.
Judging by the massive amounts of stuff (I need to purge) in our house I”d say I”m a big collector. But I don”t *think* I collect a lot of stuff. I just like stuff. Stuff is fun. Cozy. Stuff is therapeutic.
Luckily for my husband shoes is not something on my list of collections. Neither is chotchkies and doodads on shelving.
Things I do seem to buy a lot of:
I love purses and bags. The whole minimalist philosophy of “Do I have something that already serves this purpose? If so I don”t need it” absolutely does not apply. I particularly love colorful bags (Like Vera Bradley) or just plain black. I usually prefer them to have two longer straps or handles. I am not a fan of hipsters personally. I also like backpacks and gym backs and totes. Oh and recycled shopping bags, preferably with bright colors and fun, cute designs.
Lotion & Perfumes & Body Scrubby Concoctions
This is sort of a weird collection. I go all sorts of crazy buying different lotions and stuff from Body Works (ahh Sugar Scrubs!), Bath & Body Works (Pearberry come back to me please!) and Target (Jergens, Tanning Lotions, Calendula creams, whatever smells good at the moment (but NEVER raspberry scents which give me massive headaches)…) And then I use them a lot… and then they sit for a while because I get sick of them. But I like to have them. It”s weird. I know.
I was just talking to one of my BFFs tonight about how I am feeling the need to take everything out of my craft bins and inventory it all. I forget what I have and these bins are like 15 years in the making. But seriously? When you get email coupons to JoAnns, Michaels and Hobby Lobby that you can print and use at any of these stores because they all accept competitors coupons, and then you stack them on a sale? It”s magic. Complete with glue and glitter and feathers and jagged edged scissors. It”s true. Try it.
I”m gonna say this is partially Et la roulette en ligne est aimee par les fans francais comme elle l’a toujours ete. Hubs” collection (problem) too. We”re geeks. Just to get an idea of the EXTRA stuff we have (aside from the everyday laptops, smartphones, game consoles, HDTVs, storage server schtuff… we have two old computers sitting around waiting for me to jackhammer the harddrives and trash the rest. And we have old PDAs, stereos, speakers, cables (OMG we might need that old conversion cable that worked only on this piece of obsolete equipment from 1997 for a time capsule someday), cell phones, wires, keyboards, mice, yadda yadda, etc. I think we even have an extra VCR, still functional, to go with the one that”s hooked up but never used. Sigh. The problem is this – I can not bring myself to dump all this in to a landfill. But I really don”t care to take the time to sell it in a yard sale because it”s probably not worth my time. I don”t know. So Electronics. We are early adopters of most cool things (you”re welcome for those lower prices later) and that means we lots of old electronics too.
I realize I sound like a hoarder. I am NOT!
What do you collect? Why do you collect them? Are you an impulse buyer or a carefully planned shopper?
Come on! We know you girls are out there reading – so participate and have some fun!
p.s. If at all possible, please head on over to Friends of Maddie today to make a donation for Maddie”s 3rd birthday. That money will help collect a lot of stuff to help families babies in the NICU. And I think that”s a really great thing.
I”ve been having sex since 2004. I was 19, and my “first time” was something of an accident. Since then, the sex has dramatically
improved, and I”ve been able to have fun somewhere other than the bedroom of a boy-man who lives at home while his mother puts around upstairs.
I”m going to count oral sex in my “crazy” places list, because I was far crazier when younger. Right now, the craziest place we have sex is the living room floor, and that”s because our bedroom is a fucking mess.
The Forest Floor
First of all, let me say this: DO NOT DO THIS. It”s crazy, NOT sexy. There is nothing sexy about bugs, no matter how pretty the forest floor looks with golden beams of light streaming in through the trees and multi-colored leaves blanketing dirt. It doesn”t even matter if you lay on a ratty blanket from the back of your parents” car or your jean jacket. Also, if multi-colored leaves are blanketing the dirt, it”s Autumn you dumbass, and it just might be cold when you get naked. DUH.
Ok I”m straying from the oral sex thing here too. This was just one fucking hot makeout session. But I WANTED TO HAVE SEX with him. So I am counting it, yes?
We weren”t dating, he was my ex-boyfriend”s best friend and my boss”s son. We were in a tiny little real estate office where we both worked. He was class president and had a huge fucking cock. And I wanted him to bang me. He pulled one of those moves where after we started kissing, he picked me up, I wrapped my legs around him and he held me up against the wall.
I”d never wanted to be ravaged before, but that”s all I could think. That, and “wow his tongue is as huge as his dick.”
The Rehearsal Dressing Room
With the aforementioned ex-boyfriend, oral sex only, in a dark dressing room in the high school after hours (but during rehearsals for the concert band, apparently. oops) on a dirty carpet but we didn”t care, because his parents didn”t want us to be together and we felt like Romeo and Juliet. You know, until he broke my heart a few months later.
The Movie Theatre
This is crazy, and skeevy, and dangerous, because when you get tattled on pokies online and caught by a cop, you may not be as lucky as I was. You may not be able to remind the cop that he is clearly married but was just recently propositioning my mother out in the parking lot of a convenience store, and he might not let you off the hook, this time.
The Soundproof Rehearsal Room at the Music College
Baby grand piano. Sound proof room. Yes, it is small and a little bit cold, but Teh Sex will heat it right up, thankyouverymuch. He made up for our crappy “first time” with that performance. Oh and that desk in the corner helps with leverage.
Also, it”s not as sound proof as you think. The trombone player next door totally heard us.
Bathroom of your new boyfriend”s best friend”s house right after you met them
Bathrooms are NOT soundproof. In fact, they are like echo chambers. This means that when you BOTH walk out of the bathroom a little drunk and your face is flaming and your hair is mussed and he pretends that we were in there together because (wait for it) “She likes to make me nervous by watching me pee” (WTF?!?!?!!) they aren”t going to believe you. Because they heard your orgasm.
Great first impression, btw.
Couch of Aforementioned Now-Husband”s Best Friend”s House While Best Friend and Wife Also Fuck on Loveseat
We were very drunk. Also, we concieved our first child. I”m sure she can”t wait to hear this story.
Alright, I showed you mine, now you show me yours!
Let’s face it – with two small boys at home I get as much privacy as, say, a fish in a fish bowl. I am SO ready for the day when I can shower in peace and quiet, get dressed in peace and quiet, go to the bathroom alone (ZOMG!) and talk on the telephone without constant interruption and chaos. (On the other hand – when this day finally comes it will mean my babies are not babies anymore and BOO! to that thought!)
So despite the fact that I don’t get to put my underwear on alone there are still a few things that I require privacy for… like I don’t even want Hubs to see me do these things. (And seriously? I got over him watching me pee like when we got married).
Picking a wedgie – who wants anyone to see you pick fabric out of your butt crack?
Weighing myself – my kids beg me to step on the scale at the grocery store like they do. WHAT. EVER. No. I won’t go near the one we have at home when anyone is in the room.
Using a Netti Pot – while this is just about the best thing EVER for helping stave off sinus infections, colds, etc, I just think it’s way gross for someone to watch me pouring salt water through one nostril and seeing said water and BOOGERS drain out the other side.
Putting on Spanx – do I really need to explain this one? However good the help at smoothing my lines, I have no desire for ANYONE to see the effort I have to go through to, um, control the jiggle.
Is there anything you never want someone to see you doing?
I listen to music constantly. When I”m home all day with my little one, I turn off the television so we can sing and dance around together.
I tend to write fiction while listening to downbeat music. This gets me in the mood for drama, tension, and conflict. Also, the lyrics tend to be a little more serious than in upbeat songs and so I find the songs really affect my state of mind. I often end up singing along mindlessly while writing.
So, here”s my . It”s 34 songs, so let me just highlight a few of my favourites:
- Band of Horses – “Detlef Schrempf“: A friend recommended this song to me about a month ago and something about the haunting melody paired with the terribly romantic chorus of “My eyes can”t look at you any other way” really resonated with me. This has become the theme song for a couple I write about frequently.
- Requiem for a Dream Soundtrack – “Lux Aeterna”: This is so frickin” EPIC. You”ve heard this song in movie trailers and cell phone commercials and probably even in an elevator and don”t worry, it never gets old. I could listen to this forever. It evokes a thousand images in my mind that range from fear to glory to triumph and loss.
- Massive Attack – “Angel”: Many, many years ago, a friend introduced me to this song when I was at the lowest point of my life. I had never listened to music with this sort of vibe to it, and it really connected with me. It opened up an entire new world of music to me (trip hop!) and I KNOW that sounds cheesy, but it”s the truth. If you think you”ve heard this song before but can”t place where, it”s played online roulette during a critical scene in the movie “Snatch”.
When I”m drunk and want to stay upbeat, I turn to a totally different beat. . Yeah, as if I actually get through all of these in one drunk… I”m more likely to listen to 3 or 4 on repeat and sing them into the ground. And those 3 or 4 are likely to be:
- Flo Rida – “Low”: Whatever, if there”s anyone out there who doesn”t want to shake their booty when they hear “Shorty had them Applebottom jeans, boots with tha furrrr”, we”re probably not destined to be friends with one another. It reminds me of late nights spent laughing and chatting til the wee hours with someone I love dearly.
- Kanye West – “Gold Digger” (clean version): I may NEVER stop laughing at the memory of dancing and singing my drunken brains out to this song at BlogHer 2010″s Sparklecorn party. Oh my goodness. I LOVE THIS SONG.
- B-52s – “Love Shack”: For sheer sing-a-long-ability, this is the song I turn to at karaoke (as dear Maria can attest to). Everyone adores this song and it”s so damned catchy. It makes me smile every time I hear it, and I think of my four favourite ladies because I can remember singing it with each of them — even if one of them was threatening to kick me out of the car if I didn”t dance to it! (I love you mom!)
Maia and I spend a lot of time at home dancing. It”s way more fun than watching television, no matter how much she might love Yo Gabba Gabba. I like to think that I”m introducing her to a wide array of music, since we listen to everything that I own and then some, but we do have . A few of the most notable on it:
- Neil Diamond – “Sweet Caroline”: Every good Red Sox fan loves this song, and Maia doesn”t have a choice but to be one. This is the “Ba ba ba” song in our house, and when she wants to hear it, she”ll walk over to my computer and start babbling BA BA BA BA BA BA until I turn it on. Then we dance and bounce around and it”s good times.
- Scissor Sisters – “I Can”t Decide”: Something about this song just makes me giggle every time. It sounds like it could come straight out of a musical. I sing along with it loudly while she stomps around chasing the dogs.
- Beauty and the Beast Soundtrack – “Be Our Guest”: Oh my goodness. I pick her up and whirl and dip her and we both giggle and wiggle until we”re breathless. I”m trying to teach her to do “DRAMA!” during the part with the clock — that is, put her hand to her forehead and lean her head back — but as for right now, she just laughs herself silly while I do it.
What about you? What kind of music do you listen to for setting a certain kind of mood?
There’s one major reason that I love fall “fashion” every year: Security blankets. All summer long, I enjoy wearing tank tops and flip flops. But deep down, I hate being exposed. I had long hair until I was 22 because I needed the Curtain of Sorrow to hide behind in school. Obviously I have more confidence and less emo these days, but really, I still love being all wrapped up in fabric.
In fact, until very recently, I practically lived in a huge black sweatshirt I stole from my husband. Sometimes when I’m having a really bad day, I get it out. I also drag it on airplane flights so I can cry in it and panic in the comfort of soft, worn cotton.
Fall weather means sweaters! More jeans! Jackets! Hats! Scarves! Okay, maybe not the hats and scarves as much in Florida. (Sigh.) Last year I finally discovered boots and how they’re awesome and also how they’re really the only way I feel comfortable wearing skinny jeans.
My favorite cool-weather outfit consists of a long-ish tunic top of sorts, some kinds of floopsy sweater or jacket, and tight jeans under slouchy boots.
Actually when it comes down to it, I just want to dress like Legolas. All the time.
Minus his really bad dye job. Blame all the Marion Zimmer Bradley books I read as a child, and all the stories I scribbled about being a forest-dwelling chick-wizard with leggings and bows and arrows and daggers and supple boots. And Clan of the Cave Bear. I bet she had some kickin’ fall fashions.
One thing to be said for back to school season: you can’t put your Thursday morning post off until Thursday morning anymore. Unless you’re able to type while slinging hash and twisting your daughter’s hair into an intricate plait. Or toasting bagels and managing to yank a brush through the tangles while she insists on keeping her head pointed at an episode of Clifford she’s seen no less than 18 times THIS WEEK.
Can you tell I’m new at this? My just-turned 4-year-old started Pre-K last week, and WOW. I’m already overwhelmed. (Also, already sick! Shocking!) They send home forms and more forms and permission slips (holy hackles, I’m OLD) and germs and a lollipop and a nervous tummy for everyone. It’s a lot already, and I know it’s only going to get more complicated next year when she’s at for-realsies-all-the-day Kindergarten.
I’m going to go ahead and out my craziness right here for you all: I LOVED back to school time when I was a kid. We didn’t really do much with our summers. Mostly my brother and I stayed home and fought like cats and dogs, played outside, and made our own magazines out of construction paper. It wasn’t exactly the kind of thing one looked forward to going on endlessly, you know?
Back to school was also pretty much the only time I ever got new clothes. This is Florida, where winter means putting a sweater on over your tank top, so there wasn’t even a changing of the wardrobe to look forward to. New clothes! In all the styles of last year! Me and my bootcut, non-skinny jeans are still playing at that little game.
And the school supplies! Oh, new binders and notebooks. Of course, this was back before the school sent out a list of specifics. We just got to pick WHATEVER WE WANTED. Such freedom we had and took for granted. I shudder to think what joys my girls will be robbed of by those lists. “No Lisa Frank Trapper Keepers for you! Looks like they want plain spiral notebooks.” Ah, can’t you already hear the chorus of “But MAAWWWM”? A balm for the soul.
One thing back to school used to mean, but doesn’t anymore, is that FANTASTIC commercial for Staples or Office Depot. “It’s the most wonderful tiiiiime of the yeeeeeear!” plays in the background as a dad coasts up and down the aisle, riding a shopping cart, happily tossing in supplies while–
You know what? Let’s just YouTube that bad boy.
Seriously. My favorite commercial ever. What did we do before we could YouTube this stuff? (Do I need to put on my disclaimer pants to say we are not affiliated with Staples, Staples does not know who I am, I don’t even know if Staples is still a store, etc.? All those things, plus I love what you’re doing with your hair these days, Staples!)
Back to school, for me, has always been about new beginnings and a fresh start. The chance to come home and do your homework every night, BEFORE dinner even, until the novelty wears off and you’re up until 2AM fighting off calculus problems with Dr. Pepper and one bloodshot eye.
So, you know. Until the second week or so. At which point it’s not Back to School anymore; it’s just School. And School isn’t nearly as awesome as Back to School.
Spill it, pretties. Back to school: mopes or yays?
Everyone loves a good deal. From cheapo holiday decorations to a great deal on electronics, The Internet is a great place to find what you need – and for less.
(Don’t forget to join in and link up below so that we can all benefit from your frugal wisdom!)
Here are my standby’s for online deal-catching!
Gizmodo – #Dealzmodo! If you are looking for a deal on electronics, subscribe to Gizmodo’s
#Dealzmodo thread (RSS) for a daily round-up of the best and hottest deals on the ‘net. Related: Hobomodo,
in which they highlight stuff you can get for free <— That’s a good deal.
NewEgg.com – This site is a great place to find generally low prices and good deals, not to mention excellent reviews from folks who know what they are talking about when it comes to technology. Computer mice, thumb drives, backup drives, monitors, computers, laptops, routers – they sell it all.
Household / Personal / Clothing
RedPlum - I just recently found out about this site at BlogHer10, and it’s pretty cool. Lots of coupons and deals in every category from grocery to household. Easy to use & looks pretty sleek too. They also have an affiliate program of some sort, which I plan to look into.
Collections, Etc – This site sells incredibly cheap stuff. Sometimes you get what you pay for, sometimes it’s more worthwhile. They have everything from bathroom accessories to holiday decorations, most items under $15. For some cheap stuff that you don’t need to last forever, it’s a worthwhile look. Plus, I just like to window shop and giggle at what they come up with!
Retail Me Not – If you haven’t heard of RetailMeNot you have been living under a very expensive rock #justkidding #alittle. Seriously though, don’t buy anything online without checking Retail Me Not for a coupon code. It’s worth the extra 5 minutes for 20% off or free shipping!
Woot – Woot! is a great little site that does one thing, and does it well. Ok, well, it does TWO things. One, it offers an amazing deal every day. Two, it writes the most HILARIOUS descriptions of these items that I have ever read. These folks have a sense of humor. And it’s a bit snarky. LOVE. Their deal today is a laptop, and last week they had a car safety tool that helps break glass, etc. Also check out their Woot Side Deals forum for deals submitted by the community found elsewhere on the web.
Groupon - Groupon is another one of those sites that offers one deal a day. It’s regional, though, so you get deals related to Boston, LA, Pheonix, Seattle, Washington DC, etc. There are tons of cities on the list, so pick the one closest to you and keep an eye out for things like a $120 coupon to a car detailing place for $45, or half off a massage from the local spa.